The Demon

The come back is never easy… When you step away from what you call your craft, or take a brake from a job, then try to throw yourself back into it like you never left, time has a way of showing you there’s some catching up to do. The streets have been on fire since I dropped out of sight a few months ago, had a couple bad fallouts within that time off that derailed a lot of my plans for both my well being and that of the city’s. But I’m back now, I had to come back. I’ve broken down doors and crashed through windows on a nightly base, and still I find myself afraid of what may happen to me or someone when I lose control. It’s why I had to take the time off; this rage inside that comes over me is something I’m trying desperately to control. There are moments I can feel my life slippin away and the beast inside has taken full control. To find out there is a total stranger living inside that embraces the rush from gun fire and is a junky to the action that comes behind it is scary to me. Lusting over the feeling that takes over when I take flight across the city’s skyline and rain down on any and everyone that catches my eye disrespecting the streets. How can I feel so welcome to these feelings when taken over by them? I’ll be the first to say I’m more then confused; I really had no good reason for leaving. I can’t even call it droppin the ball, more like turning my back on the game. A game I started, in the beginning there were just the gangs and crime lords that ran the nightly news that I had to deal with. But since I first put on the mask, it’s felt like it’s been drawing more problems and higher threats to the city. And if that’s so what have I done to the city I clime to protect, are my action causing more harm then good? These questions I ask myself are what keep me confused at times and a major part of why I stepped down. Even after comin across others like myself who cover their faces and fight to save whatever’s left of there town and seeing what good this could do. It’s the demon inside me that keeps findin its way out. The broken eye socket and dislodged sternum I left a victim with that haunts me, overkill. And the pressure is on me now to clean up the mess I’ve left the city in, even if I am the magnet that keeps attracting the chaos. I’ll just haft to learn to live with that and forgive myself later, fact is deep down I know part of this is due to my actions. You can’t have the light without the dark and I try to stay between the two until the streets are civilized enough for me to step down without regret. Till that day, I’m here and accepting that truth. This is my destiny my faith, I am this figure I’ve managed to hide from myself for so long. A figure of the night fighting for and with those who represent the light, the battle within is mine to bare and no one else’s, and before I lose total control of this rage I haft to seek help. And it’s only one man that could do that, the great Master Kenshi. The man who first saw in me what I’m now finding, but it’s also that fact that has me doubting his willingness to help. I would still be a member of the clan if I didn’t get myself kicked out after losing my cool again in a fight amounts another member. The great master saw the fight and quickly dismissed me soon after. I’ll never forget the words he spoke to me, “forget now all I have taught you. The rage and pain in your heart will some day destroy you.” Then he sent me on my way, I remember packing as he stood over me explaining if I wanted to overcome such a cancer I would haft to find myself. I guess I’m still working on that, It would be a long shot going back to him asking for help. Seeing what I’ve become, exposing him to this dark figure might not have a good outcome. If all goes south with the Master, and he doesn’t take a liking to what I’ve used his teachings for, It’s all out war against him and “The Can of Hope.” A war I cant win and don’t want, one would haft to defeat thirty or so soldiers all highly skilled in the art the master taught me, “Jeet kune do.” Not to mention there’s probably twice as many followers now then there was back when I was taken under the master’s wing. I was his best student at the time, surpassing everyone in rank. But in the end none of that mattered, he looked right through that and saw the demon inside before even I could.

Black Hart

What happened to the Hero’s? There are so few of us left, those willing to stand against injustice and fight for what they consider good. These days’ people have given up on the possibility of such a thing, given up on thought of someone willing to fight for those who are haunted by the streets of Philly and has become it’s pray. Nothing looks the same when putting on the mask, I’m able to see the night as clear as day, things that use to hide in the shadows have nowhere to hide. But it’s not easy to live in the darkness; I’m trying to balance myself between the light and the darkness that has adopted me. I will always stand for the side of the light, but darkness is my ally, my weapon, my gift and a curse that still finds a way to consume me. Two nights ago I lost myself in a battle against three members from The “Red Brick syndicate.” The damage that was done to these men was beside myself, I could feel myself letting go from control and allowing that feeling take over, that feeling of freedom. When the great man that taught me what I know and use against the streets discharge me from his clan, he may have been right to do so. There’s something inside me that he saw from the beginning, something evil, a blood lust that builds inside me as time goes on. I could turn my back on the streets right now and go back to the life everyone thinks I live, but then what? What happens to those that need this alter ego that I’ve created, what happens to me? This is my life now, I love the streets. And deep down I know a part of me loves the chaos that fills them, it’s this chaos that allows me to lose myself on those I catch in the act of creating the pain that is destroying the city. It’s the chaos that has created me and given me purpose. That purpose is to protect the weak, to be something they can stand behind and not feel alone in the dark. Not a killer or what I feel myself becoming. It’s the feeling that takes over that worry’s me; the want to lose control that haunts me. I’m scared I may kill someone in battle and destroy everything I’m trying to stand for; I stand and fight for those who can’t fight for themselves. But if I’m losing grip of myself, then I’m in trouble. I’ve already lost sight on Aaron’s life years ago. Stop workin and dealing with the everyday functions around the same time, I only see my mom and pop every now then. After telling them bout my actions, it didn’t sit well with them and I felt them pull back some. I still look over them each night and drop in whenever I can, they are my only link to what my life once was. I don’t regret walkin in these shoes; I guess its confusion and doubt that’s brought me to this point. Confused of what I’m becoming and worried that I won’t be able to stop myself from giving in to the blood lust that comes over me.